The New York Yankees Prepare for Life Without Mariano Rivera

Mariano Rivera was just enjoying some exercise and shagging fly balls at Kauffman Stadium Thursday night when he suddenly tore his ACL in a freak accident that will likely end his illustrious career.

Baseball's All-time saves leader will definitely miss the remainder of the first half of the 2012 season and is quite possibly done pitching for good. He was lifted off the field by Joe Girardi and another coach and could not walk to the clubhouse on his own before being taken to the hospital for an MRI which revealed the torn ACL and meniscus. Rivera, who told reporters today that he refuses to go out like this, explained his injury like this:

Happy Trails Ivan Rodriguez: Pudge Finally Retires

The Supreme Court sides with Larry Flynt in the defamation suit Hustler Magazine v. Falwell in February. In April, Sonny Bono is elected mayor of Palm Springs, California, and Roy Orbison dies of a heart attack in December.

The year was 1988, the same year the Texas Rangers signed Ivan Rodriguez out of Puerto Rico. Old. School.

After 21 seasons in the big leagues (yep, some of you aren't even that old) Rodriguez is hanging up his catching equipment. The 40-year-old backstop, who owns the all-time record for Gold Gloves at catcher (13), intends to announce his retirement formally at a ceremony on Monday in Arlington, where he spent his first 12 big league seasons.

We'll Miss You Chipper Jones

It's been a long and wonderful road Larry Wayne, and we'll be sorry to see you go.

The news announced via the Atlanta Braves Twitter account Thursday morning made us a little sad even though we've seen it coming since at least 2010: Chipper Jones is retiring following this season. He held an emotional press conference later on in the day, which every single one of his teammates attended.

The future Hall of Fame third baseman, who has spent his entire career with the Braves, has nothing to be ashamed of. Besides maybe that fling with the Hooters waitress. We all make mistakes. Otherwise, he owns a career .304 batting average with 454 home runs, the 1999 National League MVP Award, two Silver Sluggers, seven All-Star selections, and a World Series ring from 1995. He earned the NL batting title in 2008, a year in which he also owned the highest on-base percentage in baseball at .470. Not bad.

However, injuries have piled up over the past eight years, as the soon-to-be 40-year-old hasn't missed fewer than 25 games in a season since 2004. In fact, he was contemplating retirement in 2009 when he said, "If I back up this year with the same kind of year next year, I don’t want to play the game. The game is not fun to me when I’m not playing up to my standards."

Also, he expressed interest in wanting to experience being a full-time dad before it's too late. The man has priorities.

Anyway, don't be too upset Braves fans. I'm sure as one of the best switch-hitting third baseman of all time, he will be offered a position with the team after he hangs it up so you'll see his adorable face at the ballpark likely until he kicks the bucket. He'll be like the Tommy Lasorda of Atlanta... or the Don Zimmer of Atlanta. You get the drift.

/single tear

[Atlanta Braves]

Well Hello Again Stranger: Andy Pettitte Out of Retirement

That was pretty quick... apparently retirement wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Just over a year after announcing his departure from Major League Baseball, Andy Pettitte has decided to make a comeback.

The New York Yankees announced Friday that the 39-year-old lefty had signed a minor-league deal with an invitation to big league spring training. If he ends up making the major league roster, he would get a $2.5 million, one-year contract.

Pettitte is expected in camp on Tuesday and is vying for a spot in the rotation, which already includes CC Sabathia, Hiroki Kuroda, Ivan Nova, Michael Pineda, Phil Hughes, and maybe even Freddy Garcia.

Pettitte, who owns a career 240-138 record, spent all but three of his 16 seasons in the big leagues with the Yankees, heading down to Houston to pitch for the Astros from 2004-06. In his last season in the Bronx in 2010, he was named to the American League All-Star team and went 11-3 with a 3.28 ERA. He was always dependable in the postseason, and that's always handy when you're the Yankees.

Welcome back Andy Pettitte, thanks for the surprise.

[River Ave. Blues]

Barry Bonds Gets a Slap on the Wrist, Manages to Avoid Jail Time

The Barry Bonds fiasco is finally over... at least for now.

Upon his conviction for giving "misleading testimony" (a.k.a. lying his ass off) before a grand jury investigating steroid use in sports, the Home Run King was sentenced to 30 days of house arrest, two years probation, a $4,000 fine, and 250 hours of community service on Friday. The federal judge cited his many charitable donations as part of the reason actual jail time seemed irrational.

Pat Burrell is Undecided on Whether or Not to End His Career

Oh, Pat Burrell.

It sounds like the outfielder's career might be coming to an end.

Burrell had mentioned late in the season that he would toss the idea of retirement around if he wasn't able to return to full strength, with that right foot of his giving him all kinds of trouble. Although he has yet to make an official decision, he did have this to say on Thursday:

Jorge Posada Won't Be Wearing Yankees Pinstripes in 2012

Jorge Posada has a big choice to make. Either retire and ensure his entire 17-year career is spent in New York Yankees pinstripes, or move on to another team and continue to play the game he loves. Whatever choice he makes, we think this Ballplayers Anonymous guide we created back in 2007 for Randy Johnson, Curt Schilling, David Wells, Barry Bonds, and Kenny Rogers will likely help.

For the long time backstop, now 40 years old, there's no going back to New Yankee Stadium as a member of the home team. In fact, he says "there's not even a percentage of chance" that he can come back. Russell Martin took over immediately last season while Posada became designated hitter with one year remaining on a $52.4 million, four-year deal. The switch-hitter struggled against lefties and was batting just .165 back in May when he was dropped to no. 9 in the batting order, which was apparently the last straw as he asked to be taken out of the lineup, saying he wasn’t ready to play. However, he recovered and managed to hit .235 with 14 homers and 44 RBI in 2011.

Tony La Russa to Retire from Baseball and Save all the Puppies and Kitties

February 18: It snowed in the Sahara Desert for like a half hour.

April 1: The Pinwheel Network became Nickelodeon and began entertaining children everywhere.

July 1: The Sony Walkman went on sale for the first time in Japan.

The year was 1979, the same year attorney at law Tony La Russa managed his very first baseball game. The 67-year-old skipper, who has stepped down as manager of the St. Louis Cardinals and opted for retirement, began his managerial journey with the Chicago White Sox, where he remained until 1986 when he became manager of the Oakland Athletics. He led that club to three consecutive World Series from 1988 to 1990, sweeping an earthquake-delayed Fall Classic against the San Francisco Giants in '89. He stuck around Oakland until the 1995 season before moving to St. Louis to take over the Cardinals, where he has enjoyed two Championships.

La Russa, who has managed 5,097 games, ranks third in big league history in victories (2,728), trailing only the legendary Connie Mack and John McGraw. The man has been around longer than many of you have been alive. Oddly enough, he's the first manager to ever retire immediately after winning the World Series.

Now, the vegetarian and his wife Elaine will continue their quest to save all the puppies and kitties while they head up the Animal Rescue Foundation, a no-kill shelter based in Walnut Creek, California. Ah-dorable.

Happy trails, Tony. We'll miss your chicken legs, non-stop action in the bullpen, and winning ways.

[CNN]

Carlos Zambrano Talks Retirement, Changes his Mind

Carlos Zambrano wants the Cubs to take him back, claiming he'd still like to pitch for the team, even though he said he was done with them a couple days ago.

Apparently, he was just "frustrated" when he told club personnel that he wanted to retire after his most recent start. Zambrano cleaned out his locker and said that he wanted to retire after giving up five home runs and being ejected from Friday night's 10-4 loss to the Atlanta Braves following two brushbacks to Chipper Jones.

Dan Uggla Looking for Hit No. 32 on the Streak

After collecting a hit in 31 consecutive games, Dan Uggla is tied for the 25th longest hitting streak in baseball history.

A big deal? Yes, considering this is something only 34 other players have ever done.

He officially has the longest streak in the majors this season after surpassing Andre Ethier's 30-game marathon with a first-inning single as the Braves polished off their sweep of the Marlins on Wednesday.

With an off day Thursday, Uggla will get a shot at no 32. when the Braves take on Carlos Zambrano and the Chicago Cubs at 7:37pm ET Friday night. The right-handed hitter is 1-for-9 lifetime against Big Z with four walks and five strikeouts.

Whether he breaks Joe DiMaggio's elusive record of reaching base safely in 56 straight games or not, 31 is still a pretty big number. It's an impressive number. More impressive still when you look at his .173 batting average when the streak began. Before setting his sights on Joltin' Joe, Uggla will have to surpass the longest hitting streak in Braves history: Tommy Holmes at 37 games. Anything is possible.

[Atlanta Journal Constitution]

Happy Trails Carlos Delgado

It's okay, we thought Carlos Delgado already retired, too. I guess now it's official!

The former first baseman for the New York Mets and Toronto Blue Jays, who hasn't played since May 2009 due to a hip injury, announced his intent to hang up his glove Wednesday. Unfortunately, he was just 27 longballs away from reaching the 500 Home Run Club after 17 big league seasons, where he accumulated a .280 career batting average.

Manny Ramirez: Happy Trails, Dumbass

We've known for years that Tampa Bay's designated hitter Manny Ramirez was his own special brand of stupid. Former teammates have likened him to cancer. He's made some ridiculously stupid comments. Love him or hate him, it's still big news that our favorite butterfly chasing dumbass retired today after 19 seasons.

Manny missed Thursday's game with what was called a "family issue". He was expected to return to the lineup on Friday, but the issue turned out to be what the commissioner's office called "an issue under Major League Baseball’s Joint Drug Prevention and Treatment Program". Oops.

Manny apparently failed a drug test by testing positive for a banned substance during spring training. He didn't bother to appeal the positive test. Rather than face a suspension of 100 games, Ramirez decided instead to hang it up for good. Should he decide in the future to rejoin the Rays (or whatever team would actually put up with him), he would still be required to face disciplinary action for the failed test. I'm willing to bet that Roy Oswalt's neck is wishing Manny had made this decision a few weeks ago.

Happy Trails Ian Snell

How great would it be to retire before the age of 30?

Ian Snell decided to do just that, calling it quits at age 29 after the St. Louis Cardinals sent him to the minors.

The right-hander signed a minor league deal back in January after a not-so-great 2010 season with the Seattle Mariners in which he went 0-5 with 6.41 ERA in 12 games, including eight starts.

Snell pitched in one game this Spring with the AAA Memphis Redbirds, lasting two innings and allowing two runs on March 3. He then appeared in two B-squad games, the last on Monday when he surrendered two runs in one inning against Atlanta.

Over seven big league seasons, Snell was 38-53 with a 4.80 ERA. His best season came in 2006 when he enjoyed a career-high 14 victories for the Pittsburgh Pirates.

Have a nice retirement, buddy.

[Seattle Post-Intelligencer]

We Thought Garret Anderson Retired Already

After 17 seasons in the game, Garret Anderson is hanging up his glove. Funny, we totally thought he retired already.

The 38-year-old left fielder broke into the majors back in 1994 and ended up compiling more than 2,500 hits, 287 home runs, and a career batting average of .293. He also enjoyed a World Series title with the Los Angeles Angels in 2002 and three All-Star selections.

Anderson spent his first 15 big league seasons with the Halos before joining the Atlanta Braves in 2009 and the cross-town Dodgers last season, in which he batted .181 with two homers and 12 RBI in 80 games.

Yep... it was time to call it quits. The old schooler had this to say Tuesday in a team press release:

"It is with mixed emotions that I have decided to retire from baseball. It was truly a privilege to play this wonderful game and for that I want to thank several individuals."

Happy trails, Gary.

[Big League Stew]

Happy Trails Andy Pettitte

Andy Pettitte has announced his retirement from baseball.

Actually, he'll officially announce his plan to spend the rest of his life being a retired millionaire family man Friday morning at a Yankee Stadium press conference.

Pettitte had been letting on since the end of last season that he was planning on calling it quits. After becoming a free agent, he didn't even attempt to negotiate a contract, so it became pretty clear he wasn't going to play in 2011.

The 38-year-old lefty will hang up his glove with a career 240-138 record and 3.88 ERA over 16 big league seasons. Not bad, but his postseason numbers are what he's most proud of, where he posted a 19-10 record and 3.83 ERA to go nicely with his five World Series rings.

Although Pettitte spent 13 seasons with the New York Yankees, he took a hiatus from 2004-06 to pitch for his hometown Houston Astros. He was 11-3 with a 3.28 ERA in 21 starts with New York last season, limited by a strained groin that landed him on the disabled list for a couple months toward the end of the year.

Gil Meche Doesn't Need Your $12 Million Salary

Gil Meche officially announced his retirement Tuesday at the tender age of 32. Generally, this would not surprise me, especially when considering the season he had in 2010, where he went 0-5 with a 5.69 ERA. No, I wouldn't be shocked if not for one small detail: he walked away from a $12.4 million salary.

If the right-hander would have chosen to stick around with the Kansas City Royals for the remainder of his contract -- through 2011 -- he would have had to undergo shoulder surgery, which ultimately would have kept him on the bench the entire year anyway. Back to my point... he walked away from twelve million dollars.

Happy Trails, Trevor Hoffman

After 18 seasons in the big leagues, Trevor Hoffman has finally decided to hang up his cleats.

Baseball's all-time saves leader, who many consider to be the National League's all-time greatest closer, is trading Hells Bells for a cushy desk job with the San Diego Padres front office. He had this to say during his retirement announcement at the podium atop Petco Park's home plate Wednesday:

There's Always Next Year, Braves Fans

Well that series was definitely torture -- if your idea of "torture" is four incredible baseball games.

The San Francisco Giants are one (really difficult) series closer to fans being able to scream THE GIANTS WIN THE PENNANT! THE GIANTS WIN THE PENNANT! But first they must face the hardcore Philadelphia Phillies. While they wait, they'll belt out their catchy rendition of Don't Stop Believing.

So Long, Sweet Lou

Lou Piniella has officially retired.

He decided not to wait until the end of the season like he told us back in July, but instead at the end of Sunday's 16-5 walloping by the Atlanta Braves at Wrigley Field. The Chicago Cubs, now 21 games out in the National League Central, have dropped to sad 51-74 on the season.

The 66-year-old [former] Cubs manager is walking away from baseball to tend to his 90-year-old mother, who has been ill for much of the year:

"I'm going to enjoy today. At least, I'm going to try to enjoy it.

I didn't think my career would end this way. But my mom needs me home. She hasn't gotten any better since I've been here. She has had a couple other complications, and rather than continue to go home, come back, it's not fair to the team, it's not fair to the players. So the best thing is just to step down and go home and take care of my mother."

Happy Trails, Chipper Jones :(

It's not often that we throw a sad face into the title of a post, but upon hearing the news on Chipper Jones, we're super bummed out. Almost inconsolable... we definitely need a hug.

After injuring his knee on a sweet play at third base Tuesday night in the sixth inning of the Atlanta Braves' 4-2 win over the Houston Astros, Jones is out for the season.