The Friendliest Analyst in the Universe

It has been previously documented on BLB that we weren't quite convinced that Sean Casey is the nicest guy on the planet. However, the (most recently) former Boston Red Sox first baseman's latest agenda has us thinking otherwise. He's actually pretty jolly.

Casey, 34, has decided to retire after 12 mostly under-achieving -- he twice was just one RBI away from triple digits -- yet friendly seasons in the big leagues, serving time with five different teams. He will now embark on a new journey with the MLB Network as a studio analyst. A channel which devotes 24/24 hours in a day to baseball? Yes please, I'll take two.

The perky cornerman became a three-time All-Star during his eight seasons with the Cincinatti Reds, later moving onto Pittsburgh and Detroit, and finally finishing his career in Beantown last year by batting .322 in 69 games with no longballs and 17 RBIs.

Happy Trails, Happyman.

[MLB] | [Awful Announcing] | [Diamond Hoggers] | [SOX & Dawgs]

Jim Leyland Needs to Burn a Heater

Jim Leyland is so pissed, not even a 12-8 win over the Seattle Mariners can cheer him up. But maybe that's because the Mariners are the only other team who sucks more than Detroit... by one game.

The 63-year-old Detroit Tigers manager will likely croak from some sort of stress-related aneurysm if things don't change in Motor City soon.

The 18-27 Tigers were the talk of the town this Spring, with many folks (including myself) calling not only a division win, but a possible World Series victory by the team with the second-highest payroll in baseball at $139 million. As of this week, they are sitting at dead last in the AL Central.

In an f-bomb-laced tirade Tuesday, Leyland was even calling out players who are no longer with the team. Jason Grilli, traded this season to the Colorado Rockies, claims the Tigers destroyed their clubhouse chemistry by getting rid of players like Sean Casey, voted the nicest guy in the whole wide world last season in a SI.com player's poll. Leyland begs to differ.

"Jason Grilli’s not here any longer because Jason Grilli didn’t pitch good under pressure situations and didn’t pitch very well in Detroit. You want to tell it like it is? When players want to start talking, I’ll start talking."

Hell yeah, Jimmy. We love it when you start talking. He also spouted off about his own players, whose mouths are apparently much, much bigger than their bats.

"You better be careful when you’re a player. If you’re hitting .200 and .220 and striking out, you shouldn’t be popping off... They want to play games, I’ll play games. I’ll quit protecting some of these guys night after night after night after night. And I’ll put some names to it."

We absolutely cannot wait for that night. Ok...one more.

"I’m a man. When I’m [bleep] I’m [bleep], and right now I’m [bleep]. And there are a few [bleeps] in that clubhouse right now that are [bleep], and they need to look in that mirror. Don’t look in mine. Look in theirs. Don’t point fingers. That’s weak."

Man, we love it when he flips out.

[Detroit Free Press]

Oh How The Red Sox Make Us Laugh

So last night's Yankees/Red Sox game was an ass-kicking. A pounding that I happened to be in attendance for.

Rather than spend an entire post sucking the Yankees' lollipops (cue the "They won a game. Big deal." comments), I'll just provide you with some of the comedic moments the Red Sox so graciously provided for us last night.

Cue the music...

If I could ever love a Red Sox (Sock? Soc? Sok? What's the singular for Red Sox? Oh, Suck. Gotcha.)...

Swing and a foul....and a fall...

Manny being Manny...which is pretty much like Dumb being Dumber...

Many, many thanks to Intentional Foul and Awful Announcing for help in getting these clips. We who are about to laugh salute you.

Sean Casey Heads to Beantown

Since spending the last nine seasons as a starting first baseman, free agent Sean Casey has reached a preliminary agreement on an $800,000, one-year contract with the Boston Red Sox to become a left-handed bat off the bench and Kevin Youkilis' backup.

After moving shortstop Carlos Guillen to first base for the 2008 season, the Detroit Tigers acquired Edgar Renteria from the Atlanta Braves, leaving no room for Casey on the roster.

The 33-year-old, who won last summer's MLB popularity contest, hit .296 with four homers and 54 RBIs in 143 games with the Tigers last season, striking out only 42 times. Over 11 seasons, including eight with the Cincinnati Reds, he has a career average of .301 with 130 homers and 718 RBIs.

[Boston Globe]

Shenanigans!

If you're up for reading some total nonsense go here to the Sports Illustrated website.

They held a poll to find out who 464 big league baseball players thought were the "friendliest" and "least friendly" players in the game.

You could probably guess in 000.2 seconds that Barry Bonds was voted the least friendly. That's a given. The picture they have of him however, is brilliant.

Now, to the bullcrap. The friendliest baseball player in the world is not only not Joe Mauer, he's not even on the list.

"Hi. I'm Joe Mauer. I befriended a blind kid at Cretin-Derham Hall (where I only struck out one time) and walked him to and from class everyday because I'm just that type of guy. Plus, I have awesome sideburns and I'm friends with Hall of Famer Paul Molitor".

Does it get any friendlier? Oh, apparently it does.

I guess all you need to do to be viewed as MLB's friendliest ballplayer is to play in one of the un-friendliest cities in the country and walk around 24/7 with a goofy-ass look on your face.


[SI.com Poll] | [Curtsy, SOX & Dawgs]

*This post was not serious or meant to be harmful to Sean Casey or his fans. We totally love him.