Jason Bay Could Have Been a Professional Curler

It broke my small, cold shriveled heart last winter when the Red Sox and Jason Bay couldn't seem to come to an agreement to keep Jason in the Bay State.

However, the Mets were a good option as well, as their fan base is tortured, pessimistic, and shares a blinding, irrational hatred of Princess Purplelips and the rest of those self-important taint wankers in the Bronx. If that's not a recipe for love I don't know what is.

Anywho, Bay showed up in Port St. Lucie yesterday for Spring Training, and let me just say that he charmed the PANTS OFF the occasionally angry, sometimes arrogant and always cynical New York Media. By doing what?

Jason Bay Saves the Mets!

Apparently, the New York Mets believe that Jason Bay is worth $66 million and four years of their time. Again.

The free agent outfielder has agreed to terms for just that heading into 2010, bringing more hype to the big apple than hope. Bay, 31, will play left field and bat somewhere in the middle of the lineup.

Sure, he had Alex Rodriguez-like numbers last season, nailing 36 homers (30 in four of his last five seasons) and 119 RBI with 13 stolen bags, but he also hit just .267 and struck out 162 times.

Sadly, I'm not so sure Citi Field is going to be as kind 81 games out of the year as Fenway was to Bay. Let's compare this situation to that of David Wright, who racked up 33 homers and 124 RBI in 2008 at Shea Stadium. The following season he hit double digits again! Ten home runs and 74 runs driven in at the Mets' new abode. Ouch. Last year's team leader in longballs? Daniel Murphy with 12.

The only way Bay hits 25 over the fence or passes the 100-RBI mark in 2010 is if he hides a horseshoe in his jock.

However, there are those who believe he will actually hit more homers at Citi Field. Though no one can accurately predict what he will hit based on the past, what with him moving to a different league with different opponents and all, Mets fans can only hope.

[MLB Rumors] | [Mets Merized]

Smokin' Hot Stove: John Lackey

The Boston Red Sox have been pretty busy. All in one day, they reached tentative agreements with husky right-hander John Lackey and centerfielder Mike Cameron.

Lackey agreed to a five-year contract worth roughly $17.5 million annually, according to who else, but an anonymous source familiar with the incomplete, secret negotiations. Meanwhile, Cameron agreed to a two-year contract possibly worth $8 million a season, subject to a physical.

Proud To Be An American Eh, Jason Bay?

Boston Red Sox slugger Jason Bay is a lover of America’s pastime, and now he gets to be an American. That must feel pretty good after striking out five times yesterday against the Baltimore Orioles.

Ole!

The Canadian left fielder will become a U.S. citizen this afternoon in a ceremony at Faneuil Hall in Boston. Bay, a native of British Columbia, is following in the footsteps of Dominican-born teammate David Ortiz, who was sworn in last summer at Fenway Park.

At least he waited until the day after Canada Day.

[Boston Herald] | [FanHouse] | [Projo Sports Blog]

That's a Record

Apparently, all the Washington Nationals have to do to pack 41,517 people into Nationals Park is play the Boston Red Sox.

In front of a record-setting crowd, the Sox absolutely tore apart the Nats pitching, starting with John Lannan for an 11-3 victory in their first visit to the nation's capitol since 1971. Among chants of "Let's go Red Sox!" Boston batters knocked out 17 hits, including a 4-for-4 Jason Bay's 19th homer of the season. Jacoby Ellsbury also had four hits, highlighted by the first two-triple game of his young career.

Manny Acta had a few complaints about his team's poor performance, including this gem in reference to his shaky bullpen, who surrendered eight runs on eight hits with four walks.

"These guys are supposed to just go out there and keep us in the game," the Nationals skipper said. "And they can’t do it."

No, they really can't.

Also, welcome to the big leagues, Dusty Brown.

[Boston Herald] | [SawxBlog] | [Nats 320] | [SOX & Dawgs]

Red Sox Crank It Up to Eleven

We'd probably hop on this bandwagon too, but I don't think there's any room.

The Boston Red Sox (13-6) have pushed their amazing winning streak to eleven games, thanks in part to another exciting ninth-inning Jason Bay longball. This one came as a three-run shot off Cleveland Indians "reliever" Kerry Wood for a 3-1 victory.

Manny Ramirez Involved in a 3-Way

Now that Lizzy has said her goodbyes, Manny Ramirez has been traded to the Los Angeles Dodgers in a three-team swap that also sent Jason Bay from the Pittsburgh Pirates to Beantown. The second-place Dodgers also got some cash outa the deal, so that's pretty sweet for them.