Manny Ramirez Seeks Reinstatement, Ban Cut to 50 Games... Sort Of

Just admit it already. You miss Manny Ramirez and his shenanigans.

The silly former outfielder begged to be reinstated once again this weekend while his suspension for a second failed drug test was cut from 100 games to 50 since he sat out nearly all of last season. Having already suffered through a 50-game ban for violating baseball’s drug agreement back in 2009, he was supposed to serve a 100-game suspension last spring for being a complete idiot and committing a second offense. Rather than endure the penalty, he told the commissioner’s office he was quitting baseball last April.

Anyway, Manny asked to be reinstated back in September when he realized he was banned from Winter Ball in the Dominican Republic, but that apparently that didn't get him anywhere. However, Commissioner Bud Selig is all about it this time, announcing in a statement that "as a condition of his reinstatement, Ramirez will be required to resolve his outstanding violation."

Ramirez will turn 40 in May, so I'm not sure what business he even has being reinstated. Maybe he just wanted to clear his name after that whole arrest thing in September on a domestic battery charge involving his wife. Dick.

The suspension would begin with the first game he is eligible to play, making it more of a 206-game suspension if you count the final 156 games of 2011 plus the first 50 of 2012. All he needs to do is get signed. Miami, anyone?

[SB Nation]

Jim Joyce Banned from Armando Galarraga Games

Exactly a year after Armando Galarraga was robbed of a perfect game by a Jim Joyce screwup, Major League Baseball has declared a new rule in which the umpire will not be allowed to officiate any of the pitcher's games ever again.

On June 2, 2010, the Detroit Tigers righty was just one out away from making history. However, instead of correctly calling Cleveland Indians' Jason Donald out at first base, Galarraga was forced to get the next out and settle for a complete game shutout. Definitely not as awesome as a perfect game.

After the game, Joyce apologized for getting it wrong and literally almost started bawling over the whole ordeal, tearing up as he handed the lineup card to the pitcher before the following day's contest. It's cool. We'd cry too if we fucked up that big in front of millions of people then had our mistake aired on MLB Network, Sportscenter, newspapers, and every sports blog on the entire internet for like a week straight.

Nothing Like Some Good Old Fashioned Trash Talk

There's really nothing like some good, old fashioned trash talking. I suppose it's always a good idea to draw the line somewhere, but it's funnier when you don't.

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na BAT-GIRL!

Good luck trying to get the 1960's Batman theme song out of your heads now. Mwuah ha ha ha ha!

We all know that ladies love them some baseball. And what lady wouldn't want to sit by the dugout by her favorite team, handling their sticks? MLB and Susan G. Komen for the Cure have a contest going right now where babes who love baseball can "go to bat against breast cancer" and be honorary bat girls for their favorite teams on Mothers Day.

One winner per Major League Baseball team will be selected to represent his or her favorite Major League Baseball team as an "Honorary Bat Girl" on Mother's Day. If your favorite team isn't home on Mother's Day, an alternate game will be chosen by Major League Baseball. Yes, I realize that it says "his or her" favorite MLB team - that's exactly what the MLB website says in the rules. Soooo... I guess a guy 18 years of age or older can enter to be a bat girl too.

Want to enter yourself or another amazing lady in your life? Click here. Want to read the rules and the fine print? Click here.

And, because we love you, here is the Batman theme song so you can get it out of your head. You're welcome.



[MLB]

Rookie Hazing: Thank You, Internet!

I'd like to thank the inventor of the internet (Al Gore?) for giving people a place to view all sorts of things. Among things that have made me laugh these days: photos of MLB rookies being initiated into baseball manhood. And I'm not just talking about carrying around a Chewbacca backpack.

For your viewing pleasure, I'd like to link you to some particularly good pictures that have graced the interwebs of the 2010 MLB rookies. You're welcome.

Florida Marlins

Boston Red Sox

Minnesota Twins

Philadelphia Phillies

Chicago Cubs

Cincinnati Reds

Maybe San Juan Will Watch The Marlins

A three-game series in San Juan, Puerto Rico between the New York Mets and Florida Marlins is in the works for this June.

Sure, the Mets are a pretty popular team, with their handsome third baseman and Cy Young winning-ace, but it’s no secret that the Marlins struggle to fill their seats at home.

Continue reading and comment on this story at Sports Untapped.

These Guys Kick Ass At Baseball

There are just three days left of the year 2009, so it’s time once again to travel back through the years and discuss some of the Most Memorable Sports Moments of the decade. Instead, we’re going to assemble a controversial all-decade baseball team from the glorious 2000s.

That sounds like way more fun, right? Right.

First Base: Albert Pujols. Like there was ever any argument. Prince Albert’s numbers speak for themselves: a .314 batting average, 40 doubles, 34 homers, 127 RBIs, and 118 runs scored make up his crappiest season of the decade. Since being drafted in the 13th round by the St. Louis Cardinals in 1999, he has managed to improve his game from every angle every season. In 2009, Pujols snagged 16 bases, walked 115 times and hit 47 home runs. All career highs.

Continue reading this story at Sports Untapped.

Losers of the Week

As we all know, the baseball season gives us many reasons to cheer. But just as plentiful are the moments we jeer and the people who make those moments possible.

It will be those zeroes that we'll highlight every Friday in Losers of the Week.

This week's post is sponsored by Guitar Hero.
"Guitar Hero. Putting pitchers on the DL one chord at a time."


Chicago Cubs Minor League pitcher Robert Hernandez was suspended for 50 games for testing positive for steroids. I mean seriously, have we learned nothing? Besides, if you're a 19 year-old in the minor leagues and you need steroids to get ahead, you've got no shot in the majors.

Yankees fans John Bunjaporte and Keith O'Rourke were kicked out of Yankee Stadium on Opening Day for trying to steal a piece of the decorative bunting that hung throughout the stadium. Not only were they kicked out, but they lost their season tickets and face criminal mischief charges. Shame on them. No, not the enthusiastic fans. Yankee Stadium officials. So they tried to steal some ugly banner and for that they miss the rest of the stadium's final season? What kind of a world do we live in where players are the only ones who can steal signs?

And finally, Brian McNamee is selling signed Roger Clemens memorabilia on Ebay. So far it consists of photos, baseballs and items of the like so it's pretty boring. But the minute those vials and tissues hits the auction site, I'm all over it.

And because it has become a Sarah tradition, I leave you with a song. A song about losers featuring a kid on the guitar with a t-shirt that says baseball. And thus, all the pieces come together.

And We're Off!

Happy Opening Day!!! It's a glorious day people.



I was in attendance last night at the Nationals Inaugural game at their new stadium and despite the chill, it was a great game. Here is a pictorial of a few things I learned.

George W. Bush's well thrown first pitch was by far the most impressive thing he's done during his presidency.



The scoreboard listed Cristian Guzman at 195 pounds. And I'm Santa Claus.



A Ben's Chili dog tastes waaaay better than it looks.



When the stadium runs out of fries and pretzels in the 7th inning, you need the SWAT team to control the riots.



A walkoff home run is still the most exciting thing in baseball.



Here's to a great season for all of us. Except the Red Sox.

'Twas a Night in December

As the media and members of the baseball world salivated over the release of the Mitchell Report, it was reminiscent of kids at Christmas waiting for Santa. So to that we, the Babes Who Love Baseball, bring you:

'Twas a Night in December
by Sarah, Sooze, Melissa, and Lizzy

'Twas a night in December,
When all through the league,
Anticipating the report
Had brought much fatigue.

The reporters were waiting
With pens in the air,
In hopes that St. Mitchell
Soon would be there.
[Editor's note: click on St. Mitchell above to see our gift to you]

The media was nestled all smug in their row,
With visions of pages wrapped up in a bow.

Buster in his 'kerchief, and Bud in his cap,
Had just settled down for three hours of crap.

When out in the press room, there arose such a clatter,
Oh, it's just Canseco... he doesn't really matter.

Away with the printout Gammons flew like a flash,
Scanned through the names listed and started to bash.

The spotlight on the face of the Mitchell we know,
Gave the lustre to the ticker of juicers named below.

When, what to our wondering eyes should appear,
But a list of the ones who bought "cream" and "the clear".

With the testimony of tattletales, so dumb and so thick,
We knew in a moment this wasn't a trick.

More rapid than eagles his pages they came,
And he paused and he waited, then called them by name.

Now Barry, now Roger, now Damon and Pettite,
On Rocker, on Randolph, Lo Duca and Bennett.

To the top of the order! To the bottom of the 'pen!
All kinds of names- hey, McGwire's outed... again.

As we drew in our breaths before turning around,
We thought of the cheaters St. Mitchell had found.

Clemens' face and a little round belly,
That shook, when he pitched like a bowlful of jelly.

Bonds, chubby and plump, a big lying old crank,
Whose drug use helped give him more homers than Hank.

Sheffield and Giambi, reputations as dicks,
Were both near the top of the Roid Report's picks.

Mo Vaughn's giant head shoulda' made it clear,
He wasn't too scared to stick needles in his rear.

And then there's Tejada, every little leaguers' fave,
Whose tarnished reputation may not be saved.

As Gagne listened, goggles fogged up with tears,
Wondered if it was worth juicing all these years.

Emails were quoted from GMs to scouts,
Asking questions about players they had doubts.

From Knoblach to Stanton, and Herges and Nook,
Red-faced Pujols stats were a fluke.

Of course we have Lo Duca, with eyebrows so thick,
And into his ass, a juiced needle he did stick!

Anderson's name, while he didn't tattle,
Was used all throughout to make cages rattle.

As St. Mitchell finished his revealing of names,
We wondered on the future of these baseball games.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"This is not the end! We'll continue to fight!"



P.S. Go Elf Yourself.

For another version, check out the hilarious post at Deuce of Davenport

Barry Bonds Indicted

Ooooh, Scott Boras is going to be pissed! Barry Bonds has trumped any upcoming Alex Rodriguez announcement by going and getting himself indicted.

The indictment states "During the criminal investigation, evidence was obtained including positive tests for the presence of anabolic steroids and other performance enhancing substances for Bonds and other athletes."

Should Bonds be convicted on all five counts listed in the indictment, he could go to prison for up to 30 years. While there are other unnamed athletes involved in the decision, Bond was the big fish.

I can't provide legal analysis and I won't even try. In the next few days, every lawyer under the sun is going to weigh in with an "expert" opinion. But I will say this. Pete Rose has been denied the Hall of Fame for betting on games. Betting FOR the team he was playing for. Shoeless Joe Jackson was banned, despite being acquitted by the grand jury for game fixing. If Bonds ends up in the Hall of Fame after this indictment, it will be an injustice. For the league, for the fans, and for the players who take this game seriously every day.

Bud Selig can do what he wants with the record. Asterisk it, erase it, let it stand. It's no longer about the record. It's about the responsibility of the league and those who govern it to keep the sanctity of the Hall and the game.

[Steroid Nation]

Hip, Hip, Jorge!

The Yankees and Jorge Posada came to an agreement Monday, allowing Posada to stay a Yankee for at least another four years at a price of $52.4 million. This is yet another move that shows the new Steinbrenner generation has their heads on straight.

A five time All Star, Posada hit a team-high .338 this year with 20 homers and 90 RBIs. He set career highs for average, slugging percentage (.543) and on-base percentage (.426).

Posada's entire major league career has been in a Yankee uniform, something that is rare with today's “buy and sell” baseball mentality. With the retention of Posada, the Yankees have made sure that they have core players in place to drive the team next year. Both Posada and Derek Jeter have been Yankee lifers. While their talent has a lot to do with that, it also speaks for loyalty. Loyalty that you can't “buy and sell”.

The Steinbrenner boys have made it clear that, unlike their predecessor, their priority isn't flashing cash and buying overpriced talent (read Clemens, Roger). They appear to be spending wisely and making good moves.

The only defensive hole is at third. With Wilson Betemit in the slot, the position is weak. But with Boston's Mike Lowell free to talk to other teams, it opens up a possibility for the Yankees to talk to him. The Mets have been rumored to show interest in Alex Rodriguez also. Should that come to fruition, it would be quite reasonable and financially viable for the Yankees to acquire third baseman David Wright in a deal. (Although the hormonal surge among female fans if Wright and Jeter were on the same team might tilt the earth's axis.)

The bottom line is, the Yankees have options and a promising future. A new young manager, talented and loyal players, and new decision makers who seem to get it.

[Update: I just read this post back to myself. Yeah, I'm a homer. So what?]

Free Agent Frenzy

Major League Baseball and Monster have combined to bring you another sweet online game in which you can win Opening Day tickets to the ballclub of your choice.

All you have to do is, given the list of free agents, choose which team they will land with along with your confidence level. It's free and fun, so go check it out!

[Play the Game]