"If the current pennant races were porn, what type of porn would they be?" - [Doberman on the Diamond]
"I starred on my middle school basketball team averaging 4.6 ppg." - [Introducing Liston]
"They’ve got their dirty little faces pressed up against the window, watching the Tigers and Indians feast and be merry." - [Ladies...]
"Texas molested Baltimore." - [Blown Coverage]
"Finding a primo seat at Wrigley Field can be kinda confusing sometimes." - [Home Run Derby]
"Based on his reaction the other night, I can't find that going over well." - [Red Sox Monster]
"Take that, Erik Bedard!" - [One More Dying Quail]
"If you want to see the Iceman's old high school work" - [100% Injury Rate]
"I’m a Royals fan and I’d rather not think about him, thank you very much." - [The Extrapolater]
"I'm surprised we've survived this long." - [The Transplanted Philly Fan]
"Holy shit, people write satire on the internet. Fucking preposterous I tell you." - [My Brain Says Rage]
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