Happy Opening Night, St. Louis Cardinals and Miami Marlins Fans!

...and every other baseball fan who has waited for this day since last October.

A lot can happen in one offseason, and the reigning World Champion St. Louis Cardinals and Miami Marlins are a perfect example.

The Marlins are kicking off 2012 with a complete face lift: a new name and a spastic jazzy new logo on their uniforms, a new skipper in Ozzie Guillen along with a few high-end acquisitions like Heath Bell, Jose Reyes, Mark Buehrle, and Carlos Zambrano, all in a spankin' new, $515 million ballpark. Pretty exciting stuff.

Meanwhile, the Cardinals begin defending their title on Day One of their first season without long-time manager Tony LaRussa and one-time fan favorite Albert Pujols. The team will also have to do without staff ace Chris Carpenter as well for the time being due to nerve irritation in his pitching shoulder, but they've regained Adam Wainwright, who was dearly missed during his Tommy John surgery rehab. They'll have to replace 30-40 home runs in the middle of the order without Pujols, but guys like David Freese, Matt Holiday, and everyday first baseman Lance Berkman are being counted on to do just that.

100 Years of Throwing Like a Girl

Happy Opening Day baseball fans!!!

Today, which should be a National Holiday in our opinion, (get on that Obama!) marks the 100th anniversary of the ceremonial first pitch. That's an entire century of grown men throwing like a girl.

President Barack Obama tossed out the ceremonial first pitch for the Washington Nationals this afternoon, donning a Chicago White Sox cap. The ball sailed just a bit outside (okay, it was way off target) of the glove of Ryan Zimmerman, who managed to make the catch.

A Century of Throwing Like a Girl

The 2010 baseball season will mark the 100-year anniversary of the ceremonial first pitch.

The century-old tradition of America’s pastime highlights an awkward situation that marks the end of pregame festivities and the start of the game. In old school times, the guest tossed the ball from their seat in the grandstand to the pitcher or catcher of the home team.

These days, the nervous guest stands somewhere near the mound and lobs it to the catcher as if they have never thrown a baseball in their life. More often than not, it bounces at least once on its way to the mitt. Sometimes, the ball flies over the head of the intended recipient. Often, it lands nowhere near its destination.

Don't Quit Your Day Job, Marky Mark

You know, for some reason, I thought Mark Wahlberg could throw a baseball. He had such great aim in Shooter...

P.S. Skip to the 4:37 mark (and avoid Skip Bayless) to see the ceremonial first pitch in all it's glory.

(Curtsy to NESWSports for the video)

[Insert Andruw Jones Joke Here]

Instead of having her toss the ceremonial first pitch Friday, maybe Los Angeles Dodgers officials should have considered Kristi Yamaguchi to replace that one guy who used to be awesome and somehow starts in center field these days.

Check out eTrue Sport's Raighne Davidson's take on the struggling outfielder.

Oh, The Humanity!

This gem comes straight from Awful Announcing...

Mark Mallory, the Mayor of Cincinnati, throws what could possibly be considered the worst Ceremonial First Pitch of all time. Someone please send this man a Tom Emanski video!

[Awful Announcing]